If it's true an Englishman's Castle is his home
it will of course have some kind of throne.....
a fireside armchair in front of the TV
where he'll gawp, and eat, and drink his cup of tea
(and maybe a pint or two which makes him want to pee)
......another great throne of course is the loo
where he'll read the paper whilst doing a poo
on the hardest of seats he'll happily sit
oblivious to odours from his brace and bit*
reading for hours - because he's a true Brit.
© Sonya Katasheva 2013
Author's Notes: This poem just came to me when I remembered my father the other day and how he used to spend at least an hour sitting on the loo reading his paper!! I wonder if reading on the loo is a British thing? Maybe other cultures do it too.
"Brace and bit" is Cockney for "shit".
"Toilet reading is a common and benign habit. It is involved with a longer time spent in the toilet. It seems to be more for fun and not necessarily to solve or due to medical problems." http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1365-2982.2008.01204.x/abstract
http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/booksblog/2011/oct/21/reading-on-the-loo-study
"Brace and bit" is Cockney for "shit".
"Toilet reading is a common and benign habit. It is involved with a longer time spent in the toilet. It seems to be more for fun and not necessarily to solve or due to medical problems." http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1365-2982.2008.01204.x/abstract
http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/booksblog/2011/oct/21/reading-on-the-loo-study
